Honest Reflections

Read Proverbs Chapter 7.

“He follows her impulsively, like an ox going to slaughter, like a deer bounding toward a trap.” Proverbs 7:22

The sub title in my Bible says, “A Story of Seduction” at the beginning of this section.  Verses 6-23 are exactly that, a s story of seduction. Impulsively in the original form can be translated immediately.  Meaning he gives it no thought, he just follows blindly after her, not realizing she is leading him on a path of destruction.

Seduction is so hard to resist.  It’s the piece of chocolate cake tempting you to eat it.  It’s the new pair of shoes you just know you can’t live without.  We are seduced by many things that lead us astray. It is always subtle. There is an air of mystery that usually surrounds it.  We can become obsessed with what we think we cannot have. We may be able to resist for a little while, but depending on the expertise of the seducer, we inevitably give in to our desires.

Food is always a good analogy for me.  I can’t have sweets in the house. My husband has the girl scout cookies hidden at his office.  He knows if he brings them home they won’t make it through the night. It’s a weakness for both of us.  If we have a box of them in our cupboard, it will call to us tauntingly. We won’t be able to think of anything else.  We’ll be able to last for a little while, but then we’ll give in to the temptation. Once the box is opened, there is no going back.  They will be devoured. We can’t resist. My ongoing battle with weight thus continues as I run bounding like a deer to the trap.

Unfortunately, we don’t always know when we’re being seduced, like the young man in our scripture today.  He had no idea he was heading to the slaughter. In cases like that we need to pick ourselves up, brush ourselves off and get back on the right path.  Giving grace to ourselves can be the hardest grace to extend, but it is what will help you get back on track.

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Read Proverbs Chapter 6.

“My son, if you have put up security for your neighbor or entered into an agreement with a stranger, you have been snared by the words of the your mouth, trapped by the words of your mouth.”  Proverbs 6:1-2 CSB

I learned this lesson the hard way.  When I first graduated college, I was a flight attendant.  I had three roommates. I was the only one who had good credit, therefore, I had all of the utilities put into my name.  This was before cell phones. In those days, we used phone cards for long distance calling, or you could charge it back to your home phone.

It never occurred to me this would be a problem.  But it was.

One roommate in particular, had a boyfriend in Kansas.  We were living in VA Beach. When she was on trips, she would call him, charging it to our home phone number.  The first month I received the bill it was over $1100. Money I definitely did not have. I spent the next few months eating peanuts off of the plane in order to pay the bill in full.  I also cut off the phone line, which led to a very unhappy roommate, so unhappy she moved out shortly afterwards.

It was a very difficult time for me.  I felt like the bad guy, even though I hadn’t done anything wrong.  It was then I learned about this verse. I was flying with a pilot who was a man of God.  I shared with him what was happening. He told me the Bible warned about putting up security for someone else’s debt.  I had no idea the Bible talked about such things. Yet here it is.

I had done both things.  I had put up security for a neighbor (she was after all living with me) and entered into an agreement with a stranger.  I had never met her until we were in flight attendant school together.

It was a valuable lesson.  One I’ve never forgotten. I have never done that again.  It is good to want to help people. We have to be careful we aren’t enabling them in the process.

Read Proverbs Chapter 5

“Though the lips of the forbidden woman drip honey and her words are smoother than oil, in the end she’s as bitter as wormwood and as sharp as a double edged sword.” Proverbs 5:3-4 CSB

I can’t help but think of the Southern analogy, “Bless your heart.” I’m from the north. I moved to the south over 25 years ago. I learned quickly when someone told me, “Bless your heart,” it had a double meaning. I didn’t understand it can be a passive aggressive way of insulting someone. Typically in the north, we’re a little more direct. For instance, I recently spent the weekend with college friends, some I hadn’t seen in almost 32 years. My one girlfriend told me I “married up”. And she’s right, I definitely did. I knew exactly what she meant, no hidden agenda.

Words can have so many different meanings. Especially when you look behind the obvious meaning. The forbidden woman in this verse means “to turn aside; to be a foreigner”. She is using her words to draw you away from the path you should take, trying to convince you to follow her into bitterness.

Advertisements do this all the time. The ads for exercise equipment, filled with beautifully toned bodies, leading you to believe if you use whatever machine they’re selling, you’ll have the same results. All of the food commercials, tempting and persuading you to eat unhealthy things. During political campaigns, there are countless messages trying to persuade you to vote for their candidate.

It can be difficult to decipher all of the different messages we receive from so many different sources. Recognizing the truth in a statement can be tricky. It is always wise to consider the source. Who is giving the message? What are their motives? How will this truly affect my life? Asking questions can help lead you to the truth. Trusting your instincts, if it doesn’t feel right it probably isn’t right. How does it compare to what scripture says? If it doesn’t line up with scripture, discard it. Ask a trusted friend what they think. Someone who will tell you the truth, not just agree with you.

Bottom line: Be discerning. Don’t believe everything you hear. Look beneath the surface to find the truth.

Read Proverbs Chapter 4.
“Carefully consider the path for your feet, and all your ways will be established.” Proverbs 4:26

I love what “consider” means in the original Hebrew: “to roll out.” At first when I read it, I thought how odd. “Carefully roll out the path for your feet.” It didn’t make sense at first. But then as I pondered it, I thought of the difference between walking on a flat path versus an uphill path. Flat is much easier to walk, doesn’t take as much energy and is typically more enjoyable.

Think of those big rolling machines they use when building roads. It’s always the last step in the process. They roll slowly over the newly laid pavement, flattening it out, making a smooth road for the cars that will soon be traveling on it. It does establish a clear path to follow.

How can we create clear paths for us to follow in our lives? The first thing to do is think about what you have coming up, either in the next week, month or year. I do this practically by praying over my calendar at the beginning of each week. I look ahead at my week and I pray over it. I pray over any meetings I have scheduled, I pray for the people they are with, what we will talk about etc. I pray over my work schedule, thanking God for the work, praying I honor Him with it. I pray over my exercise schedule, any trips we have planned, anything my husband has on the calendar that he is dealing with that particular week. If it’s on the calendar it gets prayed over.

Another practical way my husband and I apply this to our lives is with our monthly budget meeting. It’s always at the end of the month. We’re able to look back over the month and gauge how we did. We look ahead to what we have coming up and we budget for whatever expenses it may cost. It’s how we control our money instead of letting our money control us. It helps make our financial path flat, taking out any bumps we foresee, setting a little aside for any potholes we can’t see.

Each year, I look back over the year to see if I met my goals. I look ahead to what I want to accomplish in the year to come. I set new goals I want to achieve, writing them out and making a concrete plan on how I can accomplish them.

All of these things help me roll out the path ahead of me. They help me establish my ways. I can move forward confidently because I know God has cleared the way. He’s gone before me and prepared my path. It doesn’t mean there won’t be potholes, it just means God is already waiting to hep cushion the blow.

Read Proverbs Chapter 3.

“Don’t be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and turn away from evil.” Proverbs 3:7

Recently I started using a Hebrew-Greek Key Word Bible.  It gives you the definitions of the words in their original translation.  This particular verse had four original words in it: wise, fear, away and evil.  I looked up each of their original meanings, seeking the word God wanted me to focus on.  I thought it was going to be wise, for obvious reasons, but it wasn’t. It was evil.

Do you know how I knew?  The definition for evil in its original form is almost an entire page.  Of all of the definitions, this one was the longest. Why is evil’s definition so much longer than the other words in this particular verse? I think there are two main reasons: there are so many types of evil and there are so many examples of evil in the Bible.

Away’s definition was second.  There are almost as many ways to turn from evil as there are evils in this world. Fear was third, which we’ve already talked about. Wise was last, in this verse it’s used to describe someone skilled or experienced.

One part of the definition of evil says, “it displays 10 or various shades” of the meaning of the word.  Evil does come in shades. For example: “Would the alcoholic have taken the first drink if he/she knew it would ruin their life?” I would hope and pray the answer is no.  My point being, evil is corrupt, desperate, destructive, greedy and so much more. One drink is not evil. For someone who has an addiction to alcohol, they don’t know it when the take the first drink.  You can’t be addicted to something you’ve never tried. No one would do that to themselves.

Here is another example. Immerse a frog in cold water in a pot on the stove, then turn the heat on.  By the time the frog realizes he is boiling it’s too late. Because he is cold blooded, his blood has been rising steadily with the temperature of the water.  He didn’t notice a change until it’s too late.

That’s evil.  And being wise in your own eyes is equivalent to being a frog in cold water.  The heat is rising and you don’t even know it. So what do you do?

You keep your eyes on Jesus.  You let Him lead you. You let Him humble you.  You let Him turn you away from evil. By following His prompting, whatever it is for you, He’ll let you know when you need to turn away.  And from what. What is evil for one, isn’t necessarily evil for someone else.

As the definition says, there are a lot of shades to evil.  But only one God. Fear Him, not evil.

“We may throw the dice, but the Lord determines how they will fall.” Proverbs 16:33 NLT

In the movie, “Out of Africa” there is this line I have never forgotten:

” God made the world round so we would never be able to see to far down the road.”

That is a true statement. I was just reflecting where I was nine years ago. I didn’t know I was in for a major life turn in the days ahead. I was living with my Mom, best roommate I ever had. She hadn’t been feeling well. On March 6, 2010 she ended up in the ER, where we found out she needed emergency surgery. Because her potassium was too low, they didn’t operate until the next day. It was pancreatic cancer that had grown into her colon.

First big lesson I learned from this experience: God answers prayers before we even pray them.

The reason the pancreatic cancer grew into her colon was because of a previous surgery. This is a miracle because pancreatic cancer typically grows up the center of the body, wrapping itself around organs. This makes it inoperable because of the risk to the other organs. I learned all of this at that time. Mom’s grew into her colon because 10 years prior she had had surgery to remove a blockage. Cancer gravitates towards scar tissue. Therefore, 10 years later when I was praying for Mom to be cured of cancer, she was. She was one of the 7% of people who was able to have the cancer surgically removed. They were able to get all of it. The mass was so large it filled a bucket and was the talk of the hospital, but they got it.

God answered my prayer 10 years before I ever prayed it. The scar tissue from the original surgery gave me five more years with my mother I otherwise wouldn’t of had.

That day, March 6th, 2010 began a chain of events that turned my life completely around. I never saw it coming. That summer as my brother’s and I struggled to take care of our Mom, I grew closer to God than I ever had before. I can still remember so clearly the hours I would spend in His Word, crying out to Him for guidance and direction. My biggest prayer, “Just show me the next right step Lord. That’s all I need to know.”

Second big lesson I learned from this experience: the power of fasting.

I know you’ll find this shocking, but my brother’s and I fought during this time, as siblings do when under incredible stress. I did a fast for my family and our relationships. I was praying for God to heal us and bring us back together. I remember distinctly on the 7th day we were all going to be OK. I just knew it in my spirit. I remember thinking, “Cool, I can stop the fast now.” Immediately I heard God whisper, “Do you want a partial victory or do you want the full victory?” I chose the full victory. I went the entire ten days. I got it too. My brothers are my best friends. We worked through everything, together.

Third big lesson: God always has a plan.

On Oct. 21 st of that year I walked onto a tennis court and met the love of my life. Within two years we would be married, starting on a whole new adventure. He would help heal the relationships with my brothers. He would be there with me the night my Mom passed. He would be and still is my best friend and biggest supporter. But I never saw it coming.

It all started on March 6th when we took my Mother to the ER. God changed me completely in the months that followed. I was put in the fire of life. He used that fire to refine me, to mature me, to prepare me. It’s what He used to prepare me to meet my husband. It’s how He made room for him in my life. Prior to March 6th, I didn’t have room for anyone new in my life. It was full. After March 6th, I had room. I didn’t even realize I needed to make room, but God did. He had a plan all along.

I do believe the world is round so we can’t see too far down the road. Sometimes it is good, sometimes it is bad. Sometimes what we think is good, could actually be bad. Definitely things that appear bad at first turn out to be the best things. We don’t need to know what lies ahead, but when we look back, we begin to see clearly.

I can see clearer than I ever have before. What ever does lie ahead in the road, God is there. He is the “Alpha and Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End” (Revelation 22:13).

Read Proverbs Chapter 2.

“For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.” Proverbs 2:6 CSB

It’s interesting when I looked up the word “mouth” in Hebrew.  It comes from the word “peh” meaning to puff, i.e. blow away. The image that comes to mind is someone blowing out the candles on a birthday cake.  It’s seems an odd meaning for mouth in this phrase.

Or is it?

God so readily wants to impart wisdom to us, it is like a kid blowing out candles on his birthday cake.  He can’t wait to blow them out. His cheeks are all puffed up with air, there’s a hushed excitement all around.  Finally someone yells, “Just do it!”. Then “Gush!” He lets it all go. God so desperately wants to share with us, but are we willing to listening?  Are we noticing what He is trying to say to us?

I have to be honest.  I’m not a good listener.  God pretty much has to hit me over the head with a brick for me to get it.  Just yesterday, as I was thinking back over my life, I realized how much God had been trying to guide and direct me.  I also realized how good I was at not listening. Knowing exactly what I should do, and doing the opposite. Knowing exactly what God wanted me to do, and doing the opposite.  I’m a little bit better now then I was then, but I still have a long way to go.

God is waiting to give His wisdom to all of us.  We just have to listen to what He’s saying. We have to listen to what He’s saying through His word.  Through the circumstances we find ourselves in. Through the people we surround ourselves with. Through prayer and supplication.  We have to listen. If something keeps coming up, over and over again, it might just be God. You may want to stop and listen. It usually takes about three times before I start to get the message.  

Here’s an example.  Week after week I sit in WW.  I listen to my leader talk about tracking, for years, literally.  But I don’t track everything I eat. Friends have joined me at WW.  They track, and are losing. I don’t track, I’m not losing. Finally, just two weeks ago, the leader shared a story of woman who had -286 points but had tracked everything.  He or She was that honest with themselves. Finally, I got the message and started to track. It’s amazing, I’ve started to lose weight again.

How does that relate to God and wisdom.  I’ve been praying and praying to lose weight.  God has been trying to tell me exactly what I need to do.  I just haven’t been listening. I definitely haven’t been obeying. We need to listen to receive God’s wisdom.

Read Proverbs Chapter 1

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, fools despise wisdom and discipline.” Proverbs 1:7 CSB

The Hebrew word fear in this context, literally means reverential awe.  In other words: The reverential awe of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge.  

Fear is often misunderstood in this verse. It is respect for the Lord.  It is an understanding that He is all powerful, can do all things. He doesn’t want us to fear having a relationship with Him.  He just wants us to respect what each of our roles are in it. He is God. We are not. Simple.

Unfortunately, one of the things that impacts our feelings towards God is the relationship we had/have with our earthly father.  Because we think of God as father, and we have only one earthly father, it is easy to see why we tend to do that.

For me, I had a great Dad.  He was God fearing, took us to church every week, raised us in the Lord.  One of my favorite memories is my Dad smoking a cigarette before church in his gray suit.  The only day of the week my Dad ever wore a suit was on Sunday. Dad was a strict Dad by a lot of standards, but I always knew I was his little princess.  He spoiled me rotten. I always knew my Dad loved me.

It’s easy for me to envision a loving God.  It’s easy for me to respect God, because I know the respect I had for my father.  Others have not shared the same blessing with me. Their fathers were distant, completely absent.  Their relationships with men in general have not been good experiences. Asking them to trust in a loving Father figure is harder. Asking them to have reverential awe for Him after their experiences with their earthly father seems impossible.  Why would anyone have reverential awe for God when there is so much pain in the world? Because there is also a lot of good in the world. Because when you begin to have reverential awe for God, you will begin to see the good. When you start to see the good, you will start to see how God, as you believe and trust in Him, works all things to the good (Romans 8:28 NIV).

This is where wisdom starts, with reverential awe.

“Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice.” Proverbs 27:9 NIV

I realized something about the lifetime friends God gives you. They help keep you humble. I had the privilege this afternoon to have a nice long chat with one of my oldest friends. She knew the date of the last blog I had written, which touched my heart in a way only she could.

At one point I was sharing with her how my life seems surreal. I couldn’t believe what an amazing husband God has given me. To which she replied, “I know, think about some of the guys you dated.” I can’t type it without chuckling. I love she knows about every guy I’ve ever dated. The good, the bad, the ugly; she knows them all.

Our friendship is unique because it started when we were teenagers. To date, we have never lived in the same town together. Our friendship has always been long distance. It has always been a staple in my life. One I’ve taken for granted, as we do with those closest to us. When I was lost and adrift, she is the one who led me back to Jesus.

The beauty of our story, when we were teenagers hanging out, we never talked about God. We lost touch for about three years, during that time her faith had exploded. Mine had not. When I called her down and out, the first thing she did was tell me about Jesus.

That was decades ago. We’ve grown in Christ together ever since then. We’ve grown in a way, only friends who knew each other before Christ can grow. We’ve grown in ways you don’t realize until you have enough distance to look back and say, “Wow, we’ve come a long way since then.” The beauty of our friendship is, we both know, without doubt, it’s God that has gotten us here.

It is God that has carried us all these years. It is God that made us friends. It is God that keeps us together. It is God that has our tomorrows. And we didn’t even know it when He was doing it. We are constantly amazed at the myriad of ways He is working in our lives individually, as well as together.

Friends are gifts from God. New, old, those yet to meet. All of them are gifts from God.

“Speak, for your servant is listening.” 1 Samuel 3:10 NASB

I’m learning how obtuse I have been in my life. I’m learning all these new, big words since I started back to school. I’m spending more time in my dictionary than any other book. Obtuse, according to the dictionary means annoyingly insensitive or slow to understand. I’m guilty of both, I have been obtuse in my life. But I’m learning!

For instance, I can completely miss what is happening right in front of my face. Here’s an example from my single days. In this case I’m erring on the “slow to understand” side of the definition. We’ll see if my husband reads my blog with this one. If he does, I know I’ll hear about it, said with a big smile on my face.

I just realized an IRS agent had a crush on me, I was obtuse. He helped me when I was audited. Long story short, I had done my own taxes and made a mess of it. If you can at all help it, have someone who knows what they’re doing do your taxes. It will save you having to meet an IRS agent. Gratefully, I had a very nice one.

He was so nice, I sent him a thank you card for his efforts. About two weeks later, he calls me with a few follow-up questions. Which irritated me. I was tired of dealing with it. It just occurred to me today, when I was having my business taxes done, it was because of the card. I think the guy might of liked me.

I don’t know, I never will know. I was to obtuse to know what was happening in the moment. (See how I snuck obtuse in there? The more I use it, the more it helps me remember what it is. )

This scripture we started with is when God was calling Samuel into ministry. God had already called out several times, but Samuel didn’t know who it was that was calling. He was obtuse in the moment. The beauty of this story, God doesn’t stop trying. He keeps calling out until Samuel responds, “Speak, for your servant is listening.”

I don’t want to be obtuse when it comes to God. I want to always hear Him when He calls me.