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“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any moral excellence and if there is anything praiseworthy, dwell on these things.”  Phil. 4:8 CSB

Ten years ago on this day, in the middle of a violent thunderstorm, my friend Denny passed away.  His wife, Claudine was by his side. Denny was a transplant patient. Suffering from Hepatitis C, he needed a liver transplant.  They were on their way home from a doctor’s appointment in Richmond on 9/11/01 when they received a call they had found a match. He received a new liver that day.  Occurring on the same day as the falling of the twin towers, they had mixed emotions about the blessing. The donor was not a victim of the attacks. I met Denny shortly after the surgery.  I had become friends with Claudine in a women’s Bible study, a friendship that remains to this day. When I spoke at Denny’s memorial, I used today’s verse to describe him. Denny was all of those things to me.  He was an amazing guy I had the privilege to know.

I was single when I met Denny and Claudine.  They showed me what I wanted one day in a marriage.  They were best friends who loved Jesus together. Claudine and I would go for long bike rides together, often Denny would call while we were gone.  I never heard them hang up the phone without saying I love you. Denny had a patience with Claudine that was joyful to watch. He understood her in ways she didn’t understand herself.  When he passed, the heartache Claudine felt was hard to witness, their bond so close. But God was their core. He was their rock. Through them, I witnessed what a marriage centered on Jesus looked like up close and personal.  They didn’t put on pretense, they didn’t try to be someone they weren’t, they just tried to love like Jesus, always.

As I watched Denny’s journey, I saw his faith in God.  I watched his dependence on Him. Claudine and I did a Bible study on contentment in their home as Denny lay dying in the next room.  In the midst of their deepest valley, they sought God. I had the privilege of witnessing a faith like I had never seen before. I learned how intimately God is with us in our darkest moments.  I saw the faithfulness of God as He carried them through their days. I learned much about God through their friendship and the love they showed me. But I wouldn’t have met this amazing couple if it wasn’t for a Bible study. If I hadn’t signed up for Fit4Life, and sat beside Claudine, I would have never known the rest of the story. I would never have met Denny, I would never have experienced such a wonderful friendship.

Today, I’m thankful for Bible studies and the people they bring into my life.  What are you thankful for?

“Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; rebuke, correct, and encourage with great patience and teaching.” 2 Timothy 4:2 CSB

At my age, I have heard a lot of pastors preach.  I am grateful for them all, but there is one pastor who is above all the rest for me.  Reverend T. Donald Hamilton is a man I will never forget.  I can see his smiling face as I write these words.  He was my very first pastor at Tidal Presbyterian church and I loved him.  I cannot remember a time when I did not see him smiling. He loved to laugh, he loved the Steelers.  I remember my father commenting the Rev. Hamilton couldn’t preach a sermon without a Steeler analogy in it somewhere.  Whether that is true or not, I honestly can’t remember. But I do know this, Rev. Hamilton loved me as one of his flock my whole life.  Long after we had left the hills of Tidal, he never lost touch with us. He always knew what was going on in our lives. The only request we could not fulfill for my mother’s funeral was having him perform the ceremony, he was too sick.  He passed away not too long after Mom. Reverend Hamilton taught me about Jesus, not only through his sermons, but through his life long friendship with my family.

We take pastors for granted.  We don’t realize the sacrifices they are making with their own families when they are sitting vigil with us in the hospital.  We don’t realize the time and effort they put into their messages, trying to help us know and love God better. We have no idea how hard it is, week after week, getting up and preaching to a congregation that shows no emotion, and doesn’t engage.  One of my friends who has been a pastor for over 40 years says this about being called into ministry, “Try and do anything else, and if you still feel called, then you know it is of God.” Being a pastor isn’t just a job, it’s a calling. Being a pastor is a commitment to love the flock God gives you, to shepherd them and help them battle the enemy attacks.  Being a pastor is a lifetime commitment that can only be understood if you are one. I learned that from Reverend Hamilton by the example he set.

I am thankful for Reverend Hamilton because he introduced me to Jesus.  I’ll never forget the Sunday when I was 12 years old. I can’t remember the content of the message, but I remember the way it made me feel.  His message that day had left me with an urgency to ask Jesus into my life like never before, and so I did. My life has never been the same.

I’m thankful for pastors.  What are you thankful for today?

“Children are a heritage from the LORD, offspring a reward from him.” Psalm 127:3 NIV

Today I am thankful for my niece Casey, her entrance into this world changed my life forever.  I haven’t written about her before because she doesn’t like me to write about her. She prefers her privacy.  Today is different though, today is her birthday, a day I will be grateful for forever. I was living in Pennsylvania, on a college trip to New York City the day she was born.  I did not get to meet her until Christmas. I instantly fell in love with her, I knew I had to move to Virginia. I wanted to be a part of her life, I didn’t want to miss a minute of it.  I wanted to be her Aunt Margie. My aunt had meant so much to me, had been a part of my life from the start, I wanted Casey to have an aunt like I had. Of course, I had big shoes to fill and fell deeply short of them, but I tried. 

I had managed to get on academic probation at the school I was attending the spring after Casey was born.  I had to go in front of the academic review board at the end of the semester. They told me I would have to take summer classes to make up the classes I had failed, then I would be able to attend in the fall.  I did as they said, making all A’s. When I went to register for my fall classes they told me I was not enrolled. I once again had to go in front of the academic review board. I will never forget that Tuesday.  They now had a whole new list of requirements for me to follow, some I knew were impossible to keep. I looked those scholarly men and women in the eyes and said, “No thanks.” I’ll never forget the shocked look on their faces as I left the room.  I went home, called my brother and told him I was moving in with him. I packed all I owned in green garbage bags, threw them in my old Chevy Cavalier and headed south on Thursday. Friday I began working two jobs to save for tuition to start school in January.  I don’t know if I would have done that if it wouldn’t have been for Casey. She is the closest thing to a daughter the Lord has given me, and I’m grateful. She is Cody’s sister, his best friend. She motivated me to make a life change I desperately needed to make.  God used her to get me where I am now.

I am grateful for Casey.  I am grateful for our afternoon naps together when she was a toddler.  I am thankful for the bike rides we took, the movies we saw, the fun we have had.  I am grateful that because of her, my life changed forever. May her life be blessed in all she does, may our relationship always be close, may she never doubt the love God and I have for her. 

Today I am thankful for Casey, my life change.  What are you thankful for?

“Looking at them, Jesus said, “With man it is impossible, but not with God, because all things are possible with God.”  Mark 10:27 CSB

The day before I wrote this, I had coffee with my young friend Julia.  As I stood in line with her and her Mom, Pat, the moment felt surreal. Just two months prior, we didn’t know if Julia was going to make it.  She had given up the will to live, she had lost all hope. In desperation, I posted in our group, asking for prayers and cards to be sent. Soon after the first card arrived, I heard hope in Pat’s voice,  hope I hadn’t heard in months. Things truly started to turn around. A new doctor was brought onto the case with fresh eyes. He had a solution, more surgery was required, but he felt confident it would work.  The surgery was successful, within weeks Julia was released from the hospital. Four weeks later, we stood together in line at Starbucks. I was standing beside a walking miracle. I never thought I’d see her like this again, yet God had other plans.

Julia’s story started in 8th grade.  She had cysts that caused her to be bed ridden for 2 weeks, being bed ridden caused her digestive system to begin to shut down.  This began an eight year journey that has included 10 major surgeries, the loss of her colon, rectum, gall bladder and a ⅓ of her small intestine.  She has seen doctor’s all over the country who didn’t know what to do for her. Her parents were her advocates as they searched for someone who could help their daughter.  She entered the hospital on April 6th this year, her mother’s birthday. She would not leave again until Sept. 30th, 2 days after her 21st birthday. On July fourth, the doctor’s in Virginia Beach said there was nothing more they could do for her.  At 9:00 that evening she was in an ambulance on her way to Duke University, her only hope. The days were dark, the valley was deep, hope was lost. But then strangers who didn’t even know her started to fill her room with cards. They told her how they were praying for her, how God loved her.  As I sat with them on the bright October day having coffee, they shared how they were comforted knowing others were praying for them when they had lost the ability to pray.

As I’ve walked with Pat and Julia through this, our faith has been tested.  Every time there seemed to be hope, it would be quickly dashed. We learned not to get excited when there seemed to be an end in sight, because it never was.  Even now, it’s hard to grasp the miracle that has happened. Yet it has. In January, Julia will start back to school, God willing. Why is it miracles are so hard to believe?  Over and over again, we see in His word the truth of miracles, yet have a hard time believing in them.

I’m thankful for Julia, she is a walking miracle I’m grateful to call friend.
What are you thankful for today?

“The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped.  Therefore my heart celebrates, and I give thanks to Him with my song.”

I am thankful for the song that our founder Heather’s life sings for God.  Heather, as many of you know, has dedicated the last part of 2019 to head bowed, hands open.  Whatever prompting she gets from God, she’s following. In the time since she made that decision she has hosted a fundraiser, committed to leading the 6th grade girls group and spoken at a women’s retreat.  She meant what she said when she made a commitment to God to follow Him, no matter what He asked. She is passionate in her relationship with God, following Him to the best of her ability.

In the verse above, where it mentions, “my heart celebrating,”  I thought of it as the overflow of a passionate life lived for the Lord.  Our songs are the lives we lead, the choices we make. At our recent women’s retreat, Heather talked to us about fear.  She shared how she had overcome her own fears when she first started leading a group. From that one decision to take a step of faith, her life has never been the same.  Now, years later, she’s led several groups and started this one. God has used her willingness, her passion for Him, for His glory. At the end of her talk, Heather asked us to each write down the answer to a question.  What would you do for Jesus if you knew you wouldn’t fail? After we each had written our answer down, we passed our card around to someone else. We then spent time praying for whoever’s card we had, if we had any thoughts for them, we wrote those down as well.  We then read our card to the group, whoever’s card it was would then tell us a little about their dream. There is power in speaking your fears, there is power in praying for them, and for giving them to God. Heather challenged us to go after our dreams, pursue God will all of our hearts, not let our fears get in the way.

As you think back over your life, what song are you singing?  Are you living your best life now, or are you waiting for some unknown future time.  Heather’s willingness to live with her head bowed and her hands open, reminds us all, the time is now.  Don’t wait to do what God is prompting you to do, do it now. Trust in Him that He’ll show you the way. Follow Him passionately, let Him take you where He wants to take you.  Our days are numbered, only God knows how long we have. Don’t let fear keep you from achieving all God has for you.  

Today I’m thankful for Heather and her passion.  What are you thankful for?

“For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, since it is sanctified by the word of God and by prayer.”  1 Timothy 4:4-5 CSB

Today I’m thankful for my new friend Carolyn who taught me about rest at our women’s retreat.  In her talk, she explained how rest is to be restorative for us. But each of us are not restored in the same way.  I loved this point she made. Often times, I think we all think there is a formula for rest, but there isn’t. I find rest when I spend time with my husband.  The day after the retreat, I found rest with him while watching the Lord of the Rings trilogy.  I had never seen the movies before, he had been wanting a rainy Sunday to watch them again.  We did just that. After church, I made a big pot of chicken noodle soup and we settled in for an afternoon of Tolkien.  We sat side by side.  We ate soup, we held hands.  We had a very restful day which restored both of us.  Others may find rest by working on a puzzle, or taking a nap.  Rest restores us, and we need it.

As Carolyn said, rest is “the first thing we cut, but should be the first thing we prioritize.”  She taught us how God incorporated rest into our lives by creating the Sabbath, a day where you cease to work.  We are commanded to have a day of rest in the 10 Commandments.  Rest is a way we show faith.  When we are resting, we’re showing God we trust Him to run the world, we don’t have too.  Rest restores our soul (Psalm 23:2-3 ESV).  Rest comes in many different forms for all of us, whatever restores us is rest.  Yet we don’t rest because we don’t think it is important. We have every intention of taking the day off, but then the kids have a ball game, your neighbor needs help or an unexpected project at work pops up.  When we don’t make time to rest, we’re playing into the devil’s hands. He wants us worn out and tired, he doesn’t have to work as hard at distracting us when we’re out of energy. When we’re depleted we don’t make good decisions, our brains get tired too.

Carolyn reminded me of the importance of rest.  Why do we need it, why we don’t get it, and what we need to do to get it.  One of my favorite quotes comes from her husband, “The good is the enemy of the best.”  He is so right. We think we’re doing good when we don’t prioritize rest in our lives because we’re doing something good.  We’re watching the ball game, helping the neighbor, doing the project. But in reality, the lack of rest is keeping us from doing our best.  We aren’t at our best if our heart isn’t in what we’re doing. If we’re resentful to be at the ball game, irritated to help our neighbor, or stressed while doing the project, that’s not our best.  Good is the enemy of best.

Today I’m thankful for Carolyn.  She taught me about rest. What are you thankful for?

“For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up.”  Ecclesiastes 4:10 CSB

Today is my sister-in-law Jill’s birthday.  I’m thankful to Jill for teaching me what it is like to have a sister.  My sister was so much older than me, we never lived in the same house together, she seemed more like an aunt.  But Jill, seems like my sister, minus the “in-law.” I was still in highschool when we met and she’s been a part of the family ever since, it’s hard not to call her sister.  And Jill has always been there to pick me up when I’ve needed her too. She has always been able to see things in me I can’t see in myself. She helps me to see them too. We’ve had our good times, we’ve had our bad times, but we’ve always been family.

Solomon tells us in Ecclesiastes, “Two are better than one because they have good reward for their efforts.  For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up.  Also, if two lie down together, they can keep warm; but how can one person alone keep warm? And if someone overpowers one person, two can resist him.  A cord of three strands is not easily broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 CSB).  We all need friends in our lives, people we can count on when we’re in the valleys of life.  

I recently watched the Lord of the Rings with my husband.  The friendship between Froto and Sam was the kind of friendship Solomon was talking about.  There is this poignant moment near the end of the movie. Froto can’t go any further, he has no energy left.  Sam, barely with any strength himself, picks him up and begins to carry him up the mountain. When Froto tried to leave him behind, multiple times, Sam just ignored him and kept going.  Sam knew the importance of the journey they were on, he knew the importance of reaching their destination. He also knew the heavy burden Froto was carrying with him, Sam helped him carry the burden.  I am blessed, because God has given me that type of friend in Jill. I am blessed because my brother chose well, and gave me a sister. I am blessed because I have a sister that helps carry my burdens.

Today I am thankful for sisters.  What are you thankful for?

“I will thank the Lord for His righteousness; I will sing about the name of the Lord Most High.” Psalm 7:17 CSB

Today I’m thankful for Joyce who taught me about guilt at the women’s retreat.  Joyce educated me to the fact that women spend 6-8 hours a week feeling guilty. That equates to 300-400 hours a year spent feeling guilty.  We suffer from two types of guilt. Genuine guilt is when we do something wrong and know we’ve done it. Imaginary guilt is the guilt we feel, even though we haven’t done anything wrong.  Guilt deceives us. I love this point Joyce made, we feel guilty when we sin, we feel guilty when we don’t sin. Joyce was speaking right to me. I knew exactly what she was talking about.  But we can combat the guilt we feel. Joyce gave us practical ways how to overcome our feelings of guilt.

We need to look at the evidence, staying focused on what is true.  Make a list if you need to, it will remind you of all you are doing.  If you are suffering from imaginary guilt because you think you are disappointing someone, ask them.  Ask them what they need and listen to what they say. Appreciate yourself and all that you do. We tend to focus on what we’re doing wrong instead of all of the things we’re doing right.  Be as compassionate with yourself as you would be with others. Reverse the situation in your mind, give yourself grace. Remember, we live in the “gray area” of life. Life isn’t black and white, it is always shades of gray.  Joyce explained the gray area like this, we don’t live at the extremes, we live somewhere in the middle. We’re not always unhappy, we’re not always happy, we’re a mixture of both somewhere in the middle. We live in the gray area.  Guilt is not our normal emotion, it is just an emotion we experience periodically. Allow yourself grace to take care of you. We can’t care for others if we aren’t healthy. We’re allowed to be healthy.

Guilt does have a good purpose.  When we have sinned or hurt someone, guilt is  conviction from the Holy Spirit we’ve done something wrong.  Guilt makes us apologize when we were short with our family. Guilt alerts us when we’re heading down the wrong path.  I feel guilty if I eat too many cookies, for me, that’s a wrong path. Guilt helps me steer clear of it. We have to acknowledge the guilt, determine what type of guilt it is.  Once we do, we can either deal with our wrong actions or let it go.  

Today I’m thankful for all I learned about guilt from Joyce.  And I’m thankful for her evening prayers, great is her faithfulness.  What are you thankful for?

“I always thank God for you because of the grace of God given to you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Corinthians 1:4 CSB

Today would have been Cody’s 26th birthday, of course I’m thankful for him today.  One of the things Cody taught me most was patience. Cody could test my patience like few others.  He had very strong opinions and did not mind voicing them. He also had no problem not doing something he didn’t want to do.  God gave him a strong personality and used him to help me develop patience.  

You may have heard someone say, “I need to pray for patience.”  The typical response to this question is, “Don’t pray for patience, God will give you opportunities to practice it.”  The truth is, patience is something we work on every day, whether we realize it or not. We are working on patience when we’re waiting for the kids to get in the car.  We are working on patience when we’re stuck in traffic. We are working on patience when we’re waiting for our spouse to get home from work, or friend to come over for dinner. We are working on patience when we are waiting on the miracle. We are always working on patience.

Webster’s dictionary of 1828 defines patience perfectly. The suffering of afflictions, pain, toil, calamity, provocation or other evil, with a calm, unruffled temper; endurance without murmuring or fretfulness.  In other words, patience is getting your feathers ruffled but no one knows it because you don’t show your frustration.  Patience is when the kids get in the car after waiting five minutes, instead of yelling, we make sure they haven’t forgotten anything.  Patience is when we’re stuck in traffic, instead of getting frustrated we thank God we’re exactly where He wants us to be, doing what He wants us to do.  Patience is when our spouse or friend is an hour late for dinner, instead of giving them attitude, we hug them and ask how their day was. Patience is waiting on the miracle without giving up hope.  Patience is staying focused on God and His purpose for our lives, not on our circumstances. God is always giving us the opportunity to practice patience. Whether we realize it or not is the question.  What opportunities is God giving you today to practice patience? Most likely, it’s the people you love He uses the most, I know it is with me. 

Today I’m thankful God used Cody to help me practice patience.  What are you thankful for today?

“I will thank the Lord with all my heart; I will declare all your wondrous works.” Psalm 9:1 CSB

After I finished writing yesterday’s devotional, I was thinking about what else I would be thankful for this month.  Immediately, all of the family birthdays we have this month made me thankful for people. November 1st was my cousin Karen’s birthday, she is the daughter of my Aunt Margie I wrote about a few weeks ago.  She carries her mother’s spirit in her. I love her so much, I can’t truly put it into words. She starts the month of November birthdays for my family. This thought made me think about how thankful I am for the people in my life, which then made it easy for me to fill up 28 days of thankful devotions.  I’m going to thank God for the people He has put in my life for the rest of the month.

My friend Melissa loves people better than most.  When you sit with her and have lunch, she gives you her full attention.  She isn’t checking her phone or looking at her watch. She does not commit to things she does not want to do.  She truly has an art for telling people no. She says no with such love and grace she doesn’t hurt people’s feelings.  She recently spoke at our women’s retreat on surrender. She challenged us all to share what our struggles were with each other so we could come alongside each other in prayer.  My favorite part of her talk was when she had us all write down something we needed to let go to God, then we all threw it into the fire when we were done. A truly exhilarating moment to see my biggest struggle go up in smoke as I gave it to God.  Melissa spoke to us from her chair, bathed in firelight. I can still see her beautiful face as she told us what God had laid on her heart.

Melissa and I share a secret.  Months ago, when I was struggling through a difficult time, Melissa and I had coffee.  I poured my heart out to her and she listened with ears of love. As I was leaving, we were hugging goodbye when she had an impression from God.  In fact, I was walking down the path to leave when she said, “I have no idea why, but the word “surrender” just came to me.” Whether she remembers  this conversation or not, I do not know. But I do. God has spoken to me through Melissa twice with the same message. Apparently I need to listen.  

I’m thankful for Melissa today.  Who are you thankful for today?