Honest Reflections

“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”  John 13: 34-35
Love Week!
Love Week is something my church started doing seven years ago.  In fact, my husband and I’s first church service was the introduction of the very first Love Week.
What is Love Week?
Love Week is when members of our church go out into the community and serve.  They become the hands and feet of Jesus as they serve meals, paint houses, clean out drains.  The list is endless.  My husband and I have worked at the food pantry, cleaned animal crates, given blood, cleaned nature trails.
I loved what we did this year.  We cleaned out drains along the Noland Trail.  It was awesome.  By the time we were finished we were  covered in dirt, drenched in sweat and very hungry.  Our knees hurt, our backs felt it, but we felt great.
People thanked us as they ran or walked by us.  They were genuinely touched that we were doing such a laborious job.
Of course, I was in my glory, I got to play in dirt.
Love Week is literally one of my favorite weeks of the year.  I love seeing Jesus in action.  I love how our church dons the Love Week T-shirt and heads out into the community.
Not to judge.  Not to preach.  Only to help the community we live in be better.  Be stronger.  Be beautiful.
My favorite quote, I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again:
“Preach the gospel always, use words only when necessary.”  St. Francis of Assisi
Love Week shares the gospel without saying a word!

“…He stirs up his breezes, and the waters flow.”
‭‭Psalm‬ ‭147:18‬ ‭NIV‬‬
I did something yesterday that I haven’t done in a very long time.  In fact, I can’t remember the last time I did it.  I’m pretty sure it was as a child.
I floated.
I stretched my arms out wide on the waters of the Chesapeake Bay and I floated.  I just let the water carry me. I have to say it was very difficult.  Not the act of floating, the act of relaxing.
It became an experiment for me.  I was determined to just let go.  It was such an odd experience to be just laying there doing nothing, yet moving.  I found my neck wanting to tense, I had to consciously tell it to relax.  I found my arms wanting to move, I had to work to hold them still.  My feet wanted to kick, I had to keep them quiet.
I was close to shore, the water was only a few feet deep.  I could easily reach down and touch the sand beneath.  This gave me comfort, helped me to relax a little more.  It was something about having the security of the land right beneath me that made me feel safe.
The only way I was finally able to completely relax was to start focusing my thoughts on God.
I started thinking that this is what He wants me to do always.  To trust Him and to let Him lead me.  I began to realize how hard I fight against Him.  How I find myself wanting to go in a different direction than where He is taking me.  How I always want the security of a safety net, like touching the sand beneath me.  That I didn’t completely trust Him to carry me, like the water was at that moment.
As I started to realize these things, I started to “feel” the waves around me.  I began to be more present in the moment.  I started to realize the difference in the waves.  For the most part they were gentle and it was easy to float.  Every now and then a larger one would come and make it more difficult.  A couple of times water splashed in my face and I choked a little bit and there was an immediate sense of panic.  Those were the times when I wanted to stop floating and just quit.
Then I realized this is like life.
For the most part our days are routine.  Nothing major happens and we just go about our business.  Some days are a little rougher, we aren’t quite ourselves but we persevere. Then there are those days that choke us, where we feel like we can’t breathe.  Days we just want to quit.  Those are the toughest.  Those are the hardest days to stay afloat.
There was something else I observed in the few minutes of floating.  The direction I was headed.  Every now and then I would peek to see where I was.  In the course of those few moments, I had turned completely around from the way I had started.
Just like life.
How many times have you headed in one direction, just to find yourself in the complete opposite?  Even more, how many times has following God caused you to do the exact opposite of what you want to do?
Love instead of hate. Forgive instead of punish.  Let go instead of hold on.  Honor instead of disrespect. Trust instead of doubt.  Persevere instead of quit.
I have no idea how long I floated.  I do know that I never wanted it to end.  As I laid there, feeling the sun on my face, the waves beneath me, my body limp, I felt peace.  I felt love.  I felt secure.  I felt God.
Proverbs 3:5-6 is what kept coming to mind:
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart;
do not depend on your own understanding.
Seek his will in all you do,
and he will show you which path to take.”  
God was telling me how to float!
I just need to trust Him completely.  I don’t need to understand everything.  I just need to seek Him.  He will always show me the way.
It’s true.  He doesn’t want us to do, He wants us to be.  Be who He created us to be.  Be where He wants us to be.  Be present.  Be real.  Be here.  Be you.
Just be!

“And in the proper season I will send the showers they need.  There will be showers of blessing.”  Ezekiel 34:26
I found this nugget this morning during my morning Bible reading.  I read through the Bible every year at least once, sometimes twice.  I do different plans and studies.  The more I learn, the hungrier I am.
Everyday, there is at least one verse that jumps out at me.  I always write it in my journal.  It’s one of the ways I hear from God.  I love my time with Him.  It’s having morning coffee with my best friend.
My life is showered with blessings.  From my amazing husband to my writing, it’s a myriad of blessings too many to count.
I’m on staff at my church.  We’re currently reading through “Developing the Leader Within You” by John C. Maxwell.  In last weeks chapter he makes a case that “the good is the  the enemy of the best.”
I’ve been pondering this all week.  I’ve realized he is right.   Good is the enemy of the best.
When your life is showered with blessings, there is a lot of good.  For instance I have three passions:  serving the Lord, teaching children and walking dogs.  I get to do all three of those.  They are time consuming.  I also love to write, which also takes time.
They are all good things, but are they the enemy of what is best?  Which of those is the best?  I can even argue that all of them serve the Lord in some manner.  Obviously, serving the Lord is best, but then the question becomes, how?
I’m not sure what the answer is right now.
Interestingly enough, I read an article today about an employee who informed her company she was taking two mental health days. She emailed it to everyone including her CEO. She said she needed them so that she could come back to work the following week at 100%.  The article had gone viral because the CEO of the company had responded.  He essentially said he wished more people would do what she was doing.
He is right as well.
We all need mental health days.  We all need time to step back from our lives.  Look at them from a distance and determine:  What is best?  We need to ask ourselves, what is good in our lives that is keeping us from the best?
Mark Batterson, pastor of National Community Church in Washington D.C. says it this way:
“Change of pace + Change of place = Change of Perspective”
I realize not everyone is capable of a weekend get-a-way.  It doesn’t always have to be to a different location.  Susanna Wesley, mother of John Wesley who founded the Methodist denomination had 19 children.  All except 10 died in infancy.  She had her own way of changing pace and place to gain new perspective.
She didn’t have the luxury of getting a way.  She didn’t  have the luxury of a mental health day.  She did, however have an apron.  When she needed time away she simply put her apron over her head.  That signaled to her entire family that she was not to be disturbed.  The children all knew that she was praying, it was her time with God.
I bet she was a much nicer Mom when that apron came off of her head…
My point is simple.  It’s important to take time for yourself.  Time to reflect.  Time to think about what is good and what is best.  Time to be with God.  Life is so precious.   It is so easy to waste.  It is only with God’s leading that we can find our true purpose and live our life to the fullest.
The real question then is this:
Do you need to put your apron over your head?

“But blessed are your eyes, because they see; and your ears, because they hear.” Matthew 13:16
I was just scrolling through Facebook.  To me, it is a tool to help me know how to pray. It tells me who needs prayer on this particular day.
There is a family who is grieving the loss of their 23 year old daughter from a drug overdose.  There was a dog found buried alive in Georgia, that died the next day.  It’s the one year anniversary of the loss of a best friend for another.
Prayers of comfort are needed.
There are the usual political posts from friends on both sides of the fence.  Lots of people are enjoying the summer.  Yard work is being accomplished today by friends in Florida.  There is pool time being enjoyed in Pennsylavania and people heading to work in California.
Prayers of thanksgiving are lifted.
There are scriptures.  I always wonder what it is about that scripture that made them post it?  What is going on in their life that it touched them?  What point are they trying to make?  Is there someone specific they are hoping will read it?  Is God telling me something?
Prayers of discernment are asked.
I’m always amazed at the ads.  My husband and I share our Facebook page.  He was searching for a generator the other day. Now ads for generators pop up in my feed. That feels very intrusive to me.  How does Facebook know what we’re shopping for so quickly?
Prayers of protection for us.
All in a quick scroll through a social media page.
I’ve heard more than one message about Facebook.  How it’s people posting their highlight reel of their life.  That can definitely be argued.  Or you could look at it from another perspective.  If this is their highlight reel, how sad is the rest of their life?
I always try to look beneath the surface of the post for the motivation of it.
Often, it is pure.  People are just sharing their life.  Sometimes, there is more.  There is sadness, loneliness  and even despair.  We can miss it though if we scroll to quickly.  Within a few minutes you can see all spectrums of life.  People hurting, people rejoicing, people living.
Slow down the scroll.  Look beneath the surface.  Don’t just assume it’s a highlight reel.  Ask yourself is there more to this post than just the picture and the words?  How can I pray for them?  Do they need more than a “like” or a “comment”?  Do they need a phone call, a text or even a hug?
Who needs prayer in your life today?

“Ask me and I will tell you remarkable secrets you do not know about things to come.” Jeremiah 33:3
One of my favorite stories…
George Carver Washington, a renowned botanist started his mornings with prayer and Bible reading. He took this verse very seriously. One day he asked the Lord to reveal to him the secrets of the universe. The Lord said he couldn’t handle knowing all of those secrets. George then asked him, “Tell me the secrets of the peanut.” Over the course of the next several years God revealed to him the secrets of the peanut, over 300 uses. When he asked the same thing of the sweet potato, God revealed to him over a 115 uses for it.
Do you have the courage to do what George Carver Washington did?  Do you have the courage to ask God for some of His secrets?
When George did this, it revolutionized his life.  He went from being the son of a slave to a great American scientist.  He served on the faculty of Tuskegee University teaching sustainable farming.  World Leaders Mahatma Gandhi and Joseph Stalin sought his advice.  Thomas Edison told him “Together, we can remake the world.” Henry Ford, as well as Edison offered him state of the art facilities and resources to do his work.
He preferred is laboratory which he called “God’s little workshop.”
He was bold and courageous and he sought God’s secrets.  God answered and as a result, George changed the world and left a heck of a legacy.
What about you?  What secrets do you want God to share with you?  What are your motives?
George’s motives were to grow more intimate with his Creator and to help his fellow man and his nation.
As I prayed over this verse this morning, I wanted to know only one thing.  I wanted to know that a friend of mine that is going through a very difficult time would be ok.  That’s all I wanted God to tell me this morning.
He hasn’t told me what the future holds for her.  He has given me peace that He loves her more than I ever could. He told me He’s got this.
He answered my prayer.
That’s enough for me to know today.  Maybe tomorrow I’ll ask Him to tell me something else.
What do you want to know today?  He’s waiting to answer.

“It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in people.” Psalm 118:8
This is one of my favorite verses, it comes to mind often when dealing with people.  There are many different translations.  KJV says, “It is better to trust in the Lord…”.  It is so true, it is in God we must trust, not man.
I played a golf tournament yesterday with a lovely group of ladies.  One of them was a retired banker.  We were joking at one point about the motto of her old softball team:
“In God we trust, all others we audit.”
I think it’s a great paraphrase of Psalm 118:8, which by the way is the center verse of the Bible.  I don’t think that’s a coincidence.  In the very heart of God’s word, He tells us to trust Him.  That seems about right.
The truth is, we do need to audit people.  We can’t put all of our trust in humans.  For one thing, it’s not fair to put that much pressure on a person.  Secondly, no one can live up to that expectation, not even me.  Only God can be completely trusted.
Trust is such a fragile thing and can be so easily fractured.  Sadly, once broken, it is hard to repair.  When someone lies to me, it breaks my heart in ways that nothing else is capable of doing.
I wonder why they felt the need to lie?  What is it about me that makes them not feel comfortable telling me the truth?  It makes me feel that I have failed them as a friend.  It’s something I don’t understand.
Ironically, often times we lie because we think we’re protecting the person.  Inevitably though, it hurts worse than if the truth had been told in the first place.
Thankfully, we aren’t called to trust people.  We are called to love them.  You can love people you don’t trust.  They may not be your closest confidante, but you can still love them.
Jesus knew better than to trust people:
“But Jesus didn’t trust them, because he knew human nature.”  John 2:24
But He does love us, and we’re to love others:
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” John 13:34
It’s true, it’s hard to have a close relationship with someone you can’t trust.  Even truer is the statement, we’re to love them anyway.
I’m grateful that Jesus has set the example.  He’s a hard act to follow, but it is definitely worth the effort!

“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps.”  Proverbs 16:9
I’m reading through “The Power of a Praying Wife” by Stormie Omartian with a friend.  When I was reading today, this sentence struck me:
“History tends to repeat itself without the intervention of God.”
Wow!
Stop!
Think about that!
Think about your past.  What are things that keep repeating themselves in your life?  As you answer that question, you probably have just been given a clue to the areas of your life where you are not letting God intervene.  Mind blowing!
I always have defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.  I think I may just change that definition a bit for my life.  Insanity in my life is doing the same things over and over again and not letting God into the mix.
When I was single, my relationships didn’t start to change until I started letting God into them.  When I started to apply His principles I started having healthy relationships.  Because I consult Him now, I maintain healthy relationships.
When I was in debt, nothing changed until I decided to let God into my finances.  I wrote my first tithe check when I was on unemployment with over $40,000 in credit card debt, student loan debt and a car loan.  Hard to make the minimum payments on unemployment.  I was receiving $250 a week and I started writing that $25 check.  It was actually easier because it wasn’t a large amount at that time.
God honored that obedience.  Five months later I found a job that was more than double what I had been making previously.  Ironically, it became much harder to write the tithe check because the amount was much larger.  Yet I did.  That was almost 20 years ago and one thing I learned, God honors the tithe, always.
I didn’t become debt free immediately.  It took years.  During that time I struggled with the thought, “God, you have all the money in the world, why don’t you just cut me a check so I can be done with this?”  I asked myself that quite a bit.  It took me awhile to realize the answer.
God wouldn’t of been doing me any favors if He’d paid off my debt because I wouldn’t of learned the lesson.  I wouldn’t of learned self-control.  I wouldn’t of learned how to budget.  I wouldn’t of learned the root cause of my overspending, which had a lot to do with insecurity. I wouldn’t of learned any of that if God had wiped out my debt.  Odds are, history would of tended to repeat itself if God hand’t intervened.
Now I live debt free.  When I married my husband, I was debt free.  On our honeymoon we created our first budget.  We live within our means because the Lord intervened in my finances all those years ago.  One quarrel my husband and I don’t have is about money.  Who knew, that in teaching me how to handle money the Lord was actually helping my future marriage?
Thank God the Lord intervened.

• Where do you need God to intervene in your life?  The answer to the question, “What history keeps repeating itself in your life?” is probably a good place to start.

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens” Ecclesiastes 3:1
I have an amazing group of women that I meet with every two weeks.  It’s a new group. Today was only our fourth meeting.  The connection we have made in this brief period of time can only be described as a God thing.  They are why I love groups.  They are why I know everyone needs a group.  They are why I give my time away so other people can experience and share what we experience and share together.
Today’s topic was on seasons of life.  My favorite quote was “Sometimes good seasons have to end so great seasons can begin.”  All of us, in our group, are in different seasons of life. Sharon inspired this blog, as we talked about the different seasons of our lives.
As I pulled on my reading glasses in the midst of describing this season of my life, she astutely pointed out that “they” are an indication of the season I am in today.
I am in mid-life.  Mid-life comes with indicators.  My eyesight isn’t what it was five years ago.  My body takes longer to recover from a work out.  I have a hard time guessing someone’s age under 25.  They all look young to me.
Our study this morning challenged us to love the seasons that we are currently experiencing.   The question becomes, “How do we do that?”
How do we do that?
I think first we have to recognize that there are seasons.  That things don’t last forever.  In fact, you can bank on the fact that whatever you’re going through right now, it’s not going to last forever.  It will change.   It will end.  It will become a new season.
I struggle with identifying seasons sometimes.  It is why I am so grateful for women like those I shared time with this morning who help me identify my seasons.  You can’t love something if you don’t even know it exists.
Learning to identify seasons isn’t as apparent as the changing of seasons in Mother Nature.  If we pay attention, we will see the identifiers.  The day you become a teenager.  The day you get your driver’s license.  The day you graduate high school or college.  The day you get married.  The day you have your first child, then your second.  The day you put on your first pair of reading glasses.  These are just a few, but they all identify a new season.  Just like the cooler temperatures in September indicate Fall.
Once we recognize that our lives are divided into seasons, we can start appreciating them.  When it is Summer, I appreciate the warmth.  When I received my driver’s license I appreciated the new found freedom.  When the leaves change in the Fall I appreciate their beautful colors.  As I place my readers on my nose I appreciate the clarity they give me.
The seasons of life vary from person to person.  From Mom’s to women who never had children, there are still seasons.   Whether single or married, there are still seasons.
I’m grateful for my current season.  It isn’t all a big bowl of cherries.  Even in the struggles, I am grateful.  I am grateful because I have a God that is bigger than any struggle I will ever face.  I am grateful because there is nothing new on earth.  I am grateful for the people God gives me to help me through whatever season I am in at the time.  I am grateful because I have a God who will never leave me nor forsake me, no matter what circumstance I face.
I am grateful, because I know, that He does the same for you.  I know He loves you more than I ever could.  I know He has a plan for you.  I know it’s a good plan, one that will prosper you and not harm you.  Do you know how I know?  Because His word says so:
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
And:
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  Jeremiah 29:11
If I can count on it, so can you!
 
 

 ^“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”  Matthew 5:44
One of the most common conversations I’ve had with people is about praying for your enemies.  People are very resistant to praying for those they have categorized as their opponent. My pat answer has always been because it changes you.  It changes your heart.  It changes your perspective.
I’m currently reading through “The Power of a Praying Wife” by Stormie  Omartian.  I love how she describes it:
“The safeguard you have with prayer is that you have to go through God to do it.  This means you can’t get away with bad attitude, wrong thinking, or incorrect motives.  When you pray, God reveals anything in your personality that is resistant to His order of things.”
I love this new way of thinking about this verse, about praying for your enemies.  When you enter into prayer with God, in sincerity, you can let it all hang out.  You can rant and rave and give it all to Him.  He can handle it.  What He does with it will amaze you.
He doesn’t hit you over the head with a hammer.  He doesn’t berate you or call you names.  He loves you.  He loves the person with whom you are mad.
He will gently remind you that you have your flaws.  He will help you recognize that you have a part in the disagreement or conflict.  He will show you where you need to change.  He will do it all cushioned in such unconditional love you will be grateful.
He safeguards you from yourself as you go through Him to process your anger.  He will calm the seas of your heart.  He will give you direction.  He will help you gain perspective.
First though, you have to go to Him.

“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7
I performed my first wedding two days ago. I still can’t believe that I can now add marrying someone to my resume.  Wonderful friends who honored me when they asked me to join them together in Holy Matrimony.
It was a beautiful ceremony.  The sun was shining.  It overlooked the James River.  There was a beach and an arbor. Everyone’s hearts were full of love.
I was nervous.  As I walked to my place to begin the ceremony, I had a simple prayer.  “Help me Lord.  Help me honor You. Help me honor them.”
He surely did.  As I opened my mouth to speak, I was amazed at the words that left my mouth. They sounded sure and confident.   They sounded like I had done this a million times.  I even ad libbed a joke.  It all felt so surreal.  I wasn’t sure if it was even me.
It wasn’t me. It was all God.
He honored that prayer in such a wonderful way.  I’m still reeling in amazement.  Grateful for how He showed up for me.  Thankful for the honor of being able to bless two dear friends in such a special way!
I cast my anxiety onto Him and He showed me how much He cared, not only for me, but for them as well.
That’s how easy it is to cast your anxieties onto Him.  A simple plea for help.  He’s just waiting to show us how much He cares.
This Memorial Day I can’t help but think of all the prayers our military men and women have lifted to Him.  I am so humbled by the sacrifices they make every day for someone like me.
“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”  John 15:13
There are men and women who are doing that for me today.   There are men and women who have sacrificed their lives so that I could live in a land of freedom.
I spent this weekend free.  In addition to performing my first wedding, I played cornhole and golf.  I camped with my friends and family.  I cooked out and even went to the batting cage.  All because men and women who don’t even know me are willing to sacrifice their lives for me.
I am humbled by your sacrifice.  I am thankful for your commitment.  Words cannot express the deep gratitude that I have for your service.  I can never repay you for giving me such a gift.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you!  My prayer for you is this, the Psalm of Protection:
Psalm 91
1 Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”
3 Surely he will save you
from the fowler’s snare
and from the deadly pestilence.
4 He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
5 You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.
7 A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.
8 You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.
9 If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,”
and you make the Most High your dwelling,
10 no harm will overtake you,
no disaster will come near your tent.
11 For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
12 they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.
14 “Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
15 He will call on me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”