Month: March 2019

Read Proverbs Chapter 11.

“One person gives freely, yet gains more, another withholds what is right, only to become poor.”  Proverbs 11:24 CSB

This is an interesting verse.  The word “right” in its original form means to equate.  It basically means you get what you deserve. It’s always the people who give a lot that get a lot.  And if you’re not honest, eventually it will catch up with you. I learned this lesson quickly in life.

I spent the first 12 years of my life in Tidal, PA.  It is a village, literally says it on the sign. One of the most beautiful places on earth in my opinion.  It’s nestled in the hills of Pennsylvania. Beautiful country homes, immaculately taken care of by their owners.  Everyone knows everyone. Most are related one way or another. It isn’t a village, it’s a family. That’s where I spent the first part of my life and it’s footprints are embedded in my soul.

You know one of the reasons why?  It’s where I learned to be honest.

Living in Tidal you couldn’t lie.  Not only does everyone know everyone, everyone knows everything.  Which is a huge blessing. It’s how they care for each other so well.  It took me a long time to realize how special it really is. I always joke, when I talk about Tidal, that if you walk out your back door three times, the neighbor was coming to find out what was wrong.  You definitely don’t get away with anything in Tidal, because it always comes out. Sooner or later the truth always comes out.

Here’s what I’ve learned since I left Tidal.  It doesn’t matter if you’re in Tidal or any other part of the world, the truth always comes out.  Usually in the oddest ways. Ways of which you would never think. What goes around really does come around, withhold right, only to become poor.

When I was a flight attendant a gentleman was on the plane with his wife.  I found his wallet in the seat after they had deplaned. When I took it to customer service, I can’t remember all of the details, but they found out it wasn’t his wife he was travelling with that day.  They found out, because in the process of getting his wallet back to him, they inadvertently told his wife. I bet he never thought his wife would find out about his affair because he lost his wallet.

Withold right, only to become poor.

Read Proverbs Chapter 10.

“When there are many words, sin is unavoidable, but the one who controls his lips is prudent.”  Proverbs 10:19.

Today is my very first best friend’s birthday.  Her name is Lori, I’ve known her all my life, she is a part of this group.  She is the first person who ever asked me to sleep over at her house. I don’t even know if we were in school yet when this happened, probably.  I was so excited when she called to ask, I hung up the phone on her. She called me back and told me I wasn’t supposed to hang up the phone. One of my favorite memories.

She is a woman of not many words. I have always been amazed at how smart she is.  She always had better grades than me in school, things seemed to come easier to her.  She doesn’t let her mouth get her into trouble like I do. She is much better at controlling her lips.

I am learning though.  I’ve finally learned you can’t get into trouble with what you don’t say.  If it’s something that needs to be said, God will give you another chance to say it.  But if you’re not sure, it’s best not to say anything at all. Even a fool seems wise when they keep their mouth shut (Proverbs 17:28).  There are times, the only way I can control my lips is to physically put my hand over my mouth to keep myself from speaking.

This is incredibly effective in an argument, when emotions are running high and words just come spilling out of your mouth.  I’ve learned to walk away until I cool down enough to be able to control my lips. Until I can say things that are uplifting and encouraging, instead of tearing the person down (1 Thess. 5:11).  Usually it’s those closest to us that arouse the kind of anger which can get us into trouble with our words. Once the words are out, you can’t take them back. But if you learn ways to keep them in before they escape, you will be much more prudent.  You will save yourself from trouble.

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Read Proverbs Chapter 9.

“For by me your days will be many, and years will be added to your life.” Proverbs 9:11 CSB

Days, in this context means span of life. As we gain wisdom and apply it to our lives, it extends our days, or the span of our life.  

How?

I can speak only from my own life. I know as I’ve increased my wisdom, I make better decisions which allows me to have a healthier life.  For instance, we talked about not securing someone else’s debt which has helped me make wiser financial decisions (Proverbs 6:1-2). We talked about considering our paths which has helped me be more intentional about what goes on my calendar  (Proverbs 4:26). We talked about not being seduced which has helped me keep temptation out of my kitchen pantry (Proverbs 7:22).

When Solomon became King, God told him He would give him anything he wanted (1 Kings 3: 5-14).  Solomon asked for wisdom. God was so pleased with this request because he, “did not ask for long life or riches for yourself, or the death of your enemies, but you asked discernment for yourself to administer justice,” (1 Kings 3:11). God was so pleased, He gave Solomon the things he didn’t ask for: long life and riches.

Get wisdom first, the rest will follow.

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Reach Proverb Chapter 8.

Listen to instruction and be wise; don’t ignore it.”  Proverbs 8:33 CSB

A few years back, my husband and I bought a cheap metal shed.  We wondered why it was such a good price. As soon as we started putting it together, we quickly realized why: it had a myriad of parts to it which required hours and hours of work to put it together.  In fact, we couldn’t do it ourselves, we had to have friends come and help us.

We realized quickly as we began the project, we couldn’t do it without the instructions.  We had to follow them step by step in order to put the shed together correctly. I had all of the pieces set out in order of the steps, trying to make the process easier.  It was a thankless job, that required much patience and perseverance. Even with help it took two days to complete.

What if we had listened to instruction?  What if we had asked people who had experience with sheds for their input before we bought the cheapest one? We would of been wiser. Maybe we would have spent a little more money, but it would have been worth it for the time and energy it saved us.  But we didn’t do that, we ignored instruction and did it the hard way. We weren’t wise.

The book of Proverbs is an instruction manual for us.  There are so many valuable insights into living life, some of which we’ve already talked about.  Why not read the instruction manual before you try to do it alone? Why not become wiser in your living, allowing you to avoid some potential danger zones?  Even if it helps you avoid just one heart ache, isn’t it worth it?

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Read Proverbs Chapter 7.

“He follows her impulsively, like an ox going to slaughter, like a deer bounding toward a trap.” Proverbs 7:22

The sub title in my Bible says, “A Story of Seduction” at the beginning of this section.  Verses 6-23 are exactly that, a s story of seduction. Impulsively in the original form can be translated immediately.  Meaning he gives it no thought, he just follows blindly after her, not realizing she is leading him on a path of destruction.

Seduction is so hard to resist.  It’s the piece of chocolate cake tempting you to eat it.  It’s the new pair of shoes you just know you can’t live without.  We are seduced by many things that lead us astray. It is always subtle. There is an air of mystery that usually surrounds it.  We can become obsessed with what we think we cannot have. We may be able to resist for a little while, but depending on the expertise of the seducer, we inevitably give in to our desires.

Food is always a good analogy for me.  I can’t have sweets in the house. My husband has the girl scout cookies hidden at his office.  He knows if he brings them home they won’t make it through the night. It’s a weakness for both of us.  If we have a box of them in our cupboard, it will call to us tauntingly. We won’t be able to think of anything else.  We’ll be able to last for a little while, but then we’ll give in to the temptation. Once the box is opened, there is no going back.  They will be devoured. We can’t resist. My ongoing battle with weight thus continues as I run bounding like a deer to the trap.

Unfortunately, we don’t always know when we’re being seduced, like the young man in our scripture today.  He had no idea he was heading to the slaughter. In cases like that we need to pick ourselves up, brush ourselves off and get back on the right path.  Giving grace to ourselves can be the hardest grace to extend, but it is what will help you get back on track.

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Read Proverbs Chapter 6.

“My son, if you have put up security for your neighbor or entered into an agreement with a stranger, you have been snared by the words of the your mouth, trapped by the words of your mouth.”  Proverbs 6:1-2 CSB

I learned this lesson the hard way.  When I first graduated college, I was a flight attendant.  I had three roommates. I was the only one who had good credit, therefore, I had all of the utilities put into my name.  This was before cell phones. In those days, we used phone cards for long distance calling, or you could charge it back to your home phone.

It never occurred to me this would be a problem.  But it was.

One roommate in particular, had a boyfriend in Kansas.  We were living in VA Beach. When she was on trips, she would call him, charging it to our home phone number.  The first month I received the bill it was over $1100. Money I definitely did not have. I spent the next few months eating peanuts off of the plane in order to pay the bill in full.  I also cut off the phone line, which led to a very unhappy roommate, so unhappy she moved out shortly afterwards.

It was a very difficult time for me.  I felt like the bad guy, even though I hadn’t done anything wrong.  It was then I learned about this verse. I was flying with a pilot who was a man of God.  I shared with him what was happening. He told me the Bible warned about putting up security for someone else’s debt.  I had no idea the Bible talked about such things. Yet here it is.

I had done both things.  I had put up security for a neighbor (she was after all living with me) and entered into an agreement with a stranger.  I had never met her until we were in flight attendant school together.

It was a valuable lesson.  One I’ve never forgotten. I have never done that again.  It is good to want to help people. We have to be careful we aren’t enabling them in the process.

Read Proverbs Chapter 5

“Though the lips of the forbidden woman drip honey and her words are smoother than oil, in the end she’s as bitter as wormwood and as sharp as a double edged sword.” Proverbs 5:3-4 CSB

I can’t help but think of the Southern analogy, “Bless your heart.” I’m from the north. I moved to the south over 25 years ago. I learned quickly when someone told me, “Bless your heart,” it had a double meaning. I didn’t understand it can be a passive aggressive way of insulting someone. Typically in the north, we’re a little more direct. For instance, I recently spent the weekend with college friends, some I hadn’t seen in almost 32 years. My one girlfriend told me I “married up”. And she’s right, I definitely did. I knew exactly what she meant, no hidden agenda.

Words can have so many different meanings. Especially when you look behind the obvious meaning. The forbidden woman in this verse means “to turn aside; to be a foreigner”. She is using her words to draw you away from the path you should take, trying to convince you to follow her into bitterness.

Advertisements do this all the time. The ads for exercise equipment, filled with beautifully toned bodies, leading you to believe if you use whatever machine they’re selling, you’ll have the same results. All of the food commercials, tempting and persuading you to eat unhealthy things. During political campaigns, there are countless messages trying to persuade you to vote for their candidate.

It can be difficult to decipher all of the different messages we receive from so many different sources. Recognizing the truth in a statement can be tricky. It is always wise to consider the source. Who is giving the message? What are their motives? How will this truly affect my life? Asking questions can help lead you to the truth. Trusting your instincts, if it doesn’t feel right it probably isn’t right. How does it compare to what scripture says? If it doesn’t line up with scripture, discard it. Ask a trusted friend what they think. Someone who will tell you the truth, not just agree with you.

Bottom line: Be discerning. Don’t believe everything you hear. Look beneath the surface to find the truth.

Read Proverbs Chapter 4.
“Carefully consider the path for your feet, and all your ways will be established.” Proverbs 4:26

I love what “consider” means in the original Hebrew: “to roll out.” At first when I read it, I thought how odd. “Carefully roll out the path for your feet.” It didn’t make sense at first. But then as I pondered it, I thought of the difference between walking on a flat path versus an uphill path. Flat is much easier to walk, doesn’t take as much energy and is typically more enjoyable.

Think of those big rolling machines they use when building roads. It’s always the last step in the process. They roll slowly over the newly laid pavement, flattening it out, making a smooth road for the cars that will soon be traveling on it. It does establish a clear path to follow.

How can we create clear paths for us to follow in our lives? The first thing to do is think about what you have coming up, either in the next week, month or year. I do this practically by praying over my calendar at the beginning of each week. I look ahead at my week and I pray over it. I pray over any meetings I have scheduled, I pray for the people they are with, what we will talk about etc. I pray over my work schedule, thanking God for the work, praying I honor Him with it. I pray over my exercise schedule, any trips we have planned, anything my husband has on the calendar that he is dealing with that particular week. If it’s on the calendar it gets prayed over.

Another practical way my husband and I apply this to our lives is with our monthly budget meeting. It’s always at the end of the month. We’re able to look back over the month and gauge how we did. We look ahead to what we have coming up and we budget for whatever expenses it may cost. It’s how we control our money instead of letting our money control us. It helps make our financial path flat, taking out any bumps we foresee, setting a little aside for any potholes we can’t see.

Each year, I look back over the year to see if I met my goals. I look ahead to what I want to accomplish in the year to come. I set new goals I want to achieve, writing them out and making a concrete plan on how I can accomplish them.

All of these things help me roll out the path ahead of me. They help me establish my ways. I can move forward confidently because I know God has cleared the way. He’s gone before me and prepared my path. It doesn’t mean there won’t be potholes, it just means God is already waiting to hep cushion the blow.

Read Proverbs Chapter 3.

“Don’t be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and turn away from evil.” Proverbs 3:7

Recently I started using a Hebrew-Greek Key Word Bible.  It gives you the definitions of the words in their original translation.  This particular verse had four original words in it: wise, fear, away and evil.  I looked up each of their original meanings, seeking the word God wanted me to focus on.  I thought it was going to be wise, for obvious reasons, but it wasn’t. It was evil.

Do you know how I knew?  The definition for evil in its original form is almost an entire page.  Of all of the definitions, this one was the longest. Why is evil’s definition so much longer than the other words in this particular verse? I think there are two main reasons: there are so many types of evil and there are so many examples of evil in the Bible.

Away’s definition was second.  There are almost as many ways to turn from evil as there are evils in this world. Fear was third, which we’ve already talked about. Wise was last, in this verse it’s used to describe someone skilled or experienced.

One part of the definition of evil says, “it displays 10 or various shades” of the meaning of the word.  Evil does come in shades. For example: “Would the alcoholic have taken the first drink if he/she knew it would ruin their life?” I would hope and pray the answer is no.  My point being, evil is corrupt, desperate, destructive, greedy and so much more. One drink is not evil. For someone who has an addiction to alcohol, they don’t know it when the take the first drink.  You can’t be addicted to something you’ve never tried. No one would do that to themselves.

Here is another example. Immerse a frog in cold water in a pot on the stove, then turn the heat on.  By the time the frog realizes he is boiling it’s too late. Because he is cold blooded, his blood has been rising steadily with the temperature of the water.  He didn’t notice a change until it’s too late.

That’s evil.  And being wise in your own eyes is equivalent to being a frog in cold water.  The heat is rising and you don’t even know it. So what do you do?

You keep your eyes on Jesus.  You let Him lead you. You let Him humble you.  You let Him turn you away from evil. By following His prompting, whatever it is for you, He’ll let you know when you need to turn away.  And from what. What is evil for one, isn’t necessarily evil for someone else.

As the definition says, there are a lot of shades to evil.  But only one God. Fear Him, not evil.

“We may throw the dice, but the Lord determines how they will fall.” Proverbs 16:33 NLT

In the movie, “Out of Africa” there is this line I have never forgotten:

” God made the world round so we would never be able to see to far down the road.”

That is a true statement. I was just reflecting where I was nine years ago. I didn’t know I was in for a major life turn in the days ahead. I was living with my Mom, best roommate I ever had. She hadn’t been feeling well. On March 6, 2010 she ended up in the ER, where we found out she needed emergency surgery. Because her potassium was too low, they didn’t operate until the next day. It was pancreatic cancer that had grown into her colon.

First big lesson I learned from this experience: God answers prayers before we even pray them.

The reason the pancreatic cancer grew into her colon was because of a previous surgery. This is a miracle because pancreatic cancer typically grows up the center of the body, wrapping itself around organs. This makes it inoperable because of the risk to the other organs. I learned all of this at that time. Mom’s grew into her colon because 10 years prior she had had surgery to remove a blockage. Cancer gravitates towards scar tissue. Therefore, 10 years later when I was praying for Mom to be cured of cancer, she was. She was one of the 7% of people who was able to have the cancer surgically removed. They were able to get all of it. The mass was so large it filled a bucket and was the talk of the hospital, but they got it.

God answered my prayer 10 years before I ever prayed it. The scar tissue from the original surgery gave me five more years with my mother I otherwise wouldn’t of had.

That day, March 6th, 2010 began a chain of events that turned my life completely around. I never saw it coming. That summer as my brother’s and I struggled to take care of our Mom, I grew closer to God than I ever had before. I can still remember so clearly the hours I would spend in His Word, crying out to Him for guidance and direction. My biggest prayer, “Just show me the next right step Lord. That’s all I need to know.”

Second big lesson I learned from this experience: the power of fasting.

I know you’ll find this shocking, but my brother’s and I fought during this time, as siblings do when under incredible stress. I did a fast for my family and our relationships. I was praying for God to heal us and bring us back together. I remember distinctly on the 7th day we were all going to be OK. I just knew it in my spirit. I remember thinking, “Cool, I can stop the fast now.” Immediately I heard God whisper, “Do you want a partial victory or do you want the full victory?” I chose the full victory. I went the entire ten days. I got it too. My brothers are my best friends. We worked through everything, together.

Third big lesson: God always has a plan.

On Oct. 21 st of that year I walked onto a tennis court and met the love of my life. Within two years we would be married, starting on a whole new adventure. He would help heal the relationships with my brothers. He would be there with me the night my Mom passed. He would be and still is my best friend and biggest supporter. But I never saw it coming.

It all started on March 6th when we took my Mother to the ER. God changed me completely in the months that followed. I was put in the fire of life. He used that fire to refine me, to mature me, to prepare me. It’s what He used to prepare me to meet my husband. It’s how He made room for him in my life. Prior to March 6th, I didn’t have room for anyone new in my life. It was full. After March 6th, I had room. I didn’t even realize I needed to make room, but God did. He had a plan all along.

I do believe the world is round so we can’t see too far down the road. Sometimes it is good, sometimes it is bad. Sometimes what we think is good, could actually be bad. Definitely things that appear bad at first turn out to be the best things. We don’t need to know what lies ahead, but when we look back, we begin to see clearly.

I can see clearer than I ever have before. What ever does lie ahead in the road, God is there. He is the “Alpha and Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End” (Revelation 22:13).