![\"\"](\"https:\/\/honestreflections.host621.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Screen-Shot-2017-12-29-at-10.13.01-am-300x155.png\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
“There are \u201cfriends\u201d who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n Over the summer, my husband and I did a couples study called “Five Dates” by Mike and Jennifer Foster.\u00a0 It was phenomenal for our marriage.\u00a0 Recommended to us by our lead pastor’s wife.\u00a0 Very little work involved for my husband or I.\u00a0 It took about 10 minutes to read through some information individually.\u00a0 Then you would go on a date and answer a few seemingly insignificant questions together.\u00a0 We had the best conversations from these “dates” we’ve ever had.\u00a0 It was and is amazing how it has impacted our marriage.<\/p>\n For instance, one date the objective was to learn more about each other’s past.\u00a0 When you’ve been alive 49 years, only married six of them, there is a lot of past behind you to share.\u00a0 The question which started the whole thing went something like, “Name two events growing up that impacted your life?”<\/p>\n My husband’s were both sports related.\u00a0 Mine revolved around my Dad’s death when I was 16.\u00a0 This conversation evolved from there to my husband telling me I had a chip on my shoulder.\u00a0 He said it was unfair of me to think because he hadn’t gone through what I had he couldn’t understand my pain.\u00a0 Also, and more importantly, it did not make me queen of suffering.\u00a0 Other people suffer too.\u00a0 It may not be the same way I have suffered, but it doesn’t mean it isn’t suffering.<\/p>\n It’s easy to assign points to suffering.\u00a0 We do it based on our own life experience.\u00a0 My Dad dying versus running the wrong way up the field in a football game.\u00a0 Obviously, my Dad dying gets a 10, where his is a 2 if I was using a scale from 1-10.\u00a0 10 obviously being hardest to go through, 1 being easiest.\u00a0 That was his point.\u00a0 It’s not up to us to determine who has suffered more or less.\u00a0 We don’t actually know.\u00a0 We have no idea how much someone has suffered and we shouldn’t assume we do.<\/p>\n This was not the most amicable conversation my husband and I ever had.\u00a0 It took days for us to work through this together.\u00a0 It was a very hard truth for me to learn about myself.\u00a0 Definitely not something to be proud of having done to someone.\u00a0 Especially if that someone was my husband who I love more than anyone else in the world. I depend on my Blind Spot Monitors (BSM) so much, a couple of weeks ago I didn’t realize it had been accidentally turned off.\u00a0 I was on I-64 in rush hour traffic.\u00a0 I checked my mirrors, didn’t see the BSM going off and started to move into the next lane, right in front of a jeep I couldn’t see in my mirror.\u00a0 Gratefully it was being driven by a young guy with quick reflexes who maneuvered around me.\u00a0 \u00a0That incident made me realize my BSM’s were off AND how much I had come to depend on them.<\/p>\n The conversation with my husband was a BSM going off in my life.\u00a0 He was alerting me to something I couldn’t see in myself.\u00a0 I needed someone to tell me what I can not see.\u00a0 I needed them to do it in love.\u00a0 No one has spoken truth in love into my life as well as my husband has.\u00a0 He has helped me see things about myself I just could not see. Everyone needs BSM’s in their lives. They need to be someone who loves you.\u00a0 Who is looking out for what is best for you.\u00a0 Who can see things you can’t see.\u00a0 People you trust and love.\u00a0 I developed mine in my life.\u00a0 My BSM’s at this point are all people I’ve known for 10 years or longer, with the exception of my husband.\u00a0 Trust me when I say, all of my BSM’s approved of him when we met.\u00a0 I’m thankful they steered me towards him.\u00a0 \u00a0They could see how perfect he was for me, even before I did. “There are \u201cfriends\u201d who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24 Over the summer, my husband and I did a couples study called “Five Dates” by Mike and Jennifer Foster.\u00a0 It was phenomenal for our marriage.\u00a0 Recommended to us by our lead pastor’s wife.\u00a0 Very little work involved… Continue reading BSM's<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-522","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","without-featured-image"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/522","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=522"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/522\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":574,"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/522\/revisions\/574"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=522"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=522"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.honestreflections.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=522"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nMy husband illuminated a blind spot in my life for me that evening.\u00a0 We all have them in our lives.\u00a0 Areas that are blatantly obvious to someone else but we can’t see at all.\u00a0 In my car, I actually have “Blind Spot Monitors” on my mirrors.\u00a0 It starts blinking when someone is beside me in the one particular spot where I can’t see them if I look in the mirror.\u00a0 A blind spot.<\/p>\n
\nBefore him, it was my friends who helped me identify my blind spots.\u00a0 They were and still are active BSM’s in my life.\u00a0 I depend on them to help me see what I cannot see.\u00a0 I depend on them to keep me in the right lane.\u00a0 To help me keep my path straight.\u00a0 I can’t do life without them.\u00a0 I am heavily dependent on them.<\/p>\n
\nThere are friends who stick closer than a brother.\u00a0 You know exactly who they are.\u00a0 If you don’t have BSM’s in your life, you know where to start.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"